I'm Blind, I'm def, I'm a Rec Basketball Ref ... Gorilla Season Ends On Shady Officiating
Controversy surounded Wednesday's playoff game against the Blue Horned Frogs from the minute the bracket
seeds were announced. The pandamonium started when final standings were made available to the public. The Gorillas finished
the regular season with a record of 6-4, and should of as a result earned a first round bye. Yet what happend next quickly
evolved into a large scale conspiracy, which rivals that of the JFK assasination.
The final standings listed the Gorillas as 5-5, and playing in the opening round as a the 7th seed in the
playoffs. But as all of Gorilla Nation, and a majority of the free world know, the team finished 6-4, and should
have retained the 3rd seed in the bracket, along with a first round bye.
However, despite this apparent attack on all that is pure and holy, team captain Mike "the prophet"
Hellinger accepted this tyrannical botchery and decided not to put up an argument. "after consulting with team officals,
the orginization decided it best to accept the league changes; for we must remember the rec ball slogan: all is fair
in love and rec basketball." said Hellinger in a recent press confrence.
With those words in mind, the Gorillas took the court against the Horned Frogs in the 7-10 matchup of the
Rec Basketball playoffs. With heavy hearts and open minds, 8 noble Gorillas put up a heroic effort, only to fall in the fall
in the finalminutes of the game 54-51.
The Horned Frogs jumped out to an early lead with a series of lucky shots, coupled with a few infamous
"Farrell Finger rolls". The G-Unit would battle back with super human baskets from the "messaih", although everytime he was
blatently fouled, the referees wistle lay silent.
Smith was flown by helicopter to Bay State Medical Hospital upon the conclusion of the contest, to
repair the physical and physcological damage he sufferd at the hands of Horned Frog players, and referee indefernce.
Mike Hellinger posted a game high 23 points, while Steve "the messiah" Smith added 21 more, but their efforts
were to no avail in the win/loss column.
With the loss, the Gorilla season comes to an end in a somewhat disapointing fashion, finishing with
a record of 6-5. And even though the season might be over, there is no doubt that the Golden Gorilla legacy will live forever.
The Golden Gorillas have hopefully done their part in insuring the future of Minnechaug Rec Basketball.
It is the hope of team captain, president, and founder, Mike "the prophet" Hellinger, that Rec Ball continues to dominate
both the social and athletic scene of the institution of high learning that is Minnechaug Regional High School for years to
come.
Faithful G-Unit and Gorilla Nation fans have no fear. Although Mike "the prophet" will no longer be seen
gracefully running down the court, the team will be back next year; primed for another title run. Dan Vivian has
been selected as haire to the Gorilla throne, as he will continue the legacy of the most beloved recreational athletic franchise
north of the mason-dixon line ... the Golden Gorillas.
